Tag Archives: TEAS

A Bathroom On the Right

This selection for The Elderly American Songbook was inspired by a recent, 48-hour road trip with Allen Dean Porter, the Attention Deficit Posterboy. If that sounds harsh, get over it! Dean and I have been running with and ragging on one another since our sophomore year of high school, going on 50 years. I fail to see a good reason to clean up our act now.

ADP (hiding behind car) and myself about to depart on a 48-hour whirlwind road trip to central Missouri.

ADP (hiding behind car) and myself about to depart on a 48-hour whirlwind road trip to central Missouri.

I feel a bad urge a-risin’.
I feel the pressure build below.
Traffic streaming, they’re not compromisin’,
I’m hopin’ the sphincter valve don’t blow.
Cruisin’ through the night,
Drivin’ since daylight,
Need a bathroom on the right!

Turnpike ain’t no good way to travel.
Access control is too damned tight.
Back teeth floatin’, nerves are all a frazzle.
Need a bathroom on the right!!
If I can’t get off this road,
Somethin’s gonna explode!
Need a bathroom on the right!

Up ahead, there, what’s that sign?
I pray there ain’t no line!
There’s a bathroom on the right!!

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Posted by on December 2, 2012 in The Elderly American Songbook


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